We All Say Relationships Matter. But What Does That Really Mean?
In the risk industry—an industry characterized by complex sales—we hear it all the time: “It’s a relationship business.” It rolls off the tongue in conversations with producers, vendors, and carrier partners alike. But when you stop and really think about it, what do we actually mean by a “relationship business”?
Is it about who picks up the dinner tab? Who’s a football fanatic like yourself? Who invites you to the box seats for the big game? Or is it something much deeper?
My Experience: 70-80% of Business with People I’ve Never Met
At Magellan Risk Consulting, I work with dozens of business partners across the country. The surprising truth? I have done business with many of them for over a decade—and we’ve never met in person. Not once.
And yet, they take my call, I take theirs, and the work gets done. Efficiently. Honestly. Respectfully. We each know what to expect when we call each other’s number.
That, to me, is the real definition of a business relationship.
The Currency of Trust, Reliability, and Candor
Strong business relationships are built on a different currency: trust, reliability, and respecting each other’s time.
- Trust means I know you will do what you say you’ll do, and that you value the relationship.
- Reliability means I can count on you when things go sideways, which it frequently does.
- Candor means you tell me the truth, even when it’s uncomfortable. It’s about respecting each other’s time and setting proper expectations.
I don’t need a “free lunch & learn.” I need a business partner who freely shares knowledge, responds promptly, and helps solve problems when I call—often through brainstorming sessions to get a deal back on track.
The Illusion of Perks vs. The Reality of Partnership
There’s nothing wrong with camaraderie, dinners, or the occasional event. We’re all human, and we generally cherish the comfort of having connections. But perks don’t build lasting business relationships or value.
I want to be that “foul weather” friend they call when things go sideways, and I want to know I can call them too. It’s a mutual investment of time and respect.
Character matters! Perks and platitudes are commonplace and quickly fade. But trust with people of integrity can last a lifetime.
The producer who wins based on volume of gifts or flash might secure short-term wins. But the rainmaker who quietly, consistently delivers thoughtful guidance and stands behind their word becomes indispensable. In both up and down markets, their business and their reputation thrives.
A Recent Experience
I recently wrote a business plan for a project and forwarded it, along with the financial forecast and supporting documentation, to a select number of interested parties. The feedback was overwhelmingly positive: the plan was well structured, practical, and supported by performance reports to back up our assertions. The deal progressed to the vetting stage, and we appeared to be waiting only for the final written commitment to move forward.
Unexpectedly, the risk partner made a significant last-minute change that ultimately became a deal breaker. It was a surprise, but we were told it had nothing to do with our proposal—sometimes it really is a case of, “It’s not you, it’s me.”
Later, we learned there were internal challenges within their organization, and we were caught up in the crosswinds. C’est la vie…
We had invested significant time and energy into building the opportunity, and naturally, it was disappointing. But that’s the nature of business. What lingers is the frustration of feeling misled, even unintentionally. This is why trusted relationships matter.
I’ll buy my own lunch. What I need is candor and respect for my time.
Time to Reflect: Which Relationships Should You Nurture?
If you’re reading this, I invite you to reflect:
- Are you investing your time in relationships built on substance, or just surface-level charm and the enticement of large profits?
- Are you nurturing partnerships where knowledge flows freely and support is reciprocal?
- Do your partners call you back, every time, even after the deal is closed? Are you looking out for their business interests, and they for yours?
A trustworthy, straight-shooting business partner beats a fancy dinner every time.
The next time you hear or say “it’s a relationship business,” ask yourself: what kind of relationship am I building?
